The things I find on Craigslist...

Well, as it turns out people (in this case a white lesbian) post things like "Nubian Queen Wanted"... Before I get started, the body of the posting says nothing about wanting the woman to come from Egypt or the Sudan or being royalty, therefore I will safely assume, that "Nubian Queen" is a reference to black women. First of all where did they get this from? Is this a message from the late 80s/early 90s? Last time I checked, we don't use that term anymore. (well maybe the pornos do. I wouldn't know. I do know that they like to say "Ebony" a lot though, so I wouldn't be surprised).

Let's move on... why use Nubian Queen instead of black woman? Well one could say its a sign of respect. A sense of pride and respect for self and one another is where it came from when black men and women began to refer to one another as Nubian Kings and Queens, but it turned into a pick up line, and I'm hoping that people also realized that everyone can't be a king/queen (and definitely not everyone acts like one), and that if you're a descendent of enslaved Africans that were apart of the Atlantic slave trade, its unlikely that your ancestors came from Northern Africa. Either way, your kinda corny for saying it.

But anyway, white woman, with the iffy historical relationship btwn white women and black women (i.e. black women doing white women's domestic work and their own, while being unappreciated and treated like shit... oh wait that still goes on today, but throw in brown women and more immigrants), your wanting to pamper and serve (or in your words, "spoil"), seems more like a fetish than anything else. And that is creepy. Fetishes are more about the fetishist than the fetish object, i.e. its more about wanting to be with a black woman for what she represents in the fetishists desires, than for who she is.

Now I say all this to point out that even if you, white lesbian, turn out to be the best girlfriend in the world, and actually do love your black girlfriend to pieces... you calling her queen does not erase the history/the memories, and in fact it calls attention to it. This is not to say that you won't find a black girl who thinks nothing of it, or who fetishizes you, but let's recognize that there's a little more to the phrase Nubian Queen than another term for black woman.